It has been eternity in law school (2 weeks actually, but really, you start to feel its perpetual) . 2 singkos down the bin. I can't believe I'm just so out of luck every time i get called for recits. It's just like what they say. They assign 20 cases for the day in that subject, you read 19 and you get called to recite on the twentieth. major fucker! :( And guess what? I 've been working my ass off. I've been reading till my last bit of understanding leaves me out of grogginess...

ARRRHHHGGGGHHHHHH!

they give you some three-inch thick of hard-reads and expect you to finish that in one night. oh well. i guess its just me and my lame excuses. it CAN be done i know it. i just haven't got the right tools and techniques up my sleeve.

So here i am, in this dorm room, taking a ten minute break form reading about voidable marriages and cases related to it, hoping that time and luck would be kind to me. Could you believe that?! I never, NEVER relied on luck nor believed in it. Study begets good grades. That was always the drill. But these days im sorta irritated cuz im realizing there's space for that.I nevr get called when im armed to teeth. i hate it. as it goes, people just tend to think you're just someone at the bottom of the foodchain: ignored, underestimated, and whatever.

I have to get this right, and get this right NOW. (self-pressure, hehe) Sometimes i just think its the disadvantage of expectign much out of myself. I always try to aim higher than i could shoot. sometimes, it become s emotionally (and socially, by defualt) debilitating. then again, it DRIVES me, and a drive lost will get me stranded in nowhere. so i've decided not to get rid of it. NEVERMIND that i get annoyed of myself (and feel idiotic from time to time).

So this ranting has been a frivolous waste of time ain't it? but hey. its therapy... i guess. i write like mad, yes. but you know, it just makes you a bit saner in the end. ^__^

***i'm not so frustrated after all. better get back to work. TATA!***

LooOOOve IT! ^__^

I just love the result of this quiz. lol.

You scored as Charlies Angels. You are a kick ass girl! You and your friends are intimidating! Charlies Angels 83% The Notebook 58% Legally Blonde 50% Mean Girls 42% A Cinderella Story 42% What Chick Flick is just like Your Life? created with QuizFarm.com

tough week!

it's definitely going to be a tough week. i have to edit my thesis, edit my final paper and work on 4 more rection papers for my two subjects (2 will be on two philosophers, while the other two will be on two movies). Not to mention having to deal with an extremely long final exam on saturday.

if i would try to calculate the time i need to do everything, i should not be sleeping at all... but philosophy readings are so damn boring and confusing that you have to read a paragraph for 3-5 friggin' times! So.. i end up sleeping. argH! $ %!@&^~!!

Oh GOD. help me through this week...

So This is the 'IT'....

Okay... so i just had my very last undergrad class... i feel elated, nostalgic, nervous and agitated...

after a thesis and 3 more papers, i am sooOOO done with college. i guess this is what they call the senior's syndrome... you procrastinate because it just feels so uneasy to leave what has been there with you for four years. UP has been home and my heart belongs here.

So what's with the drama? I passed UP LAE for interview and i have yet to wait for the interview schedule and I'll be on my way to UP Law... That's what I thought. THEN. It used to be one clear straight path...

Thing is, all of a sudden i have to decide whether I would stay here, continue law and be a working student (because my sister's gonna take up nursing which would drain the family's resources, as I am told)... of course, with their expectations that I will, at the same time, be able to help out with the family finances. OR they will send me to Canada for work, help them out while savin' up for my law studies...

either way it'll be tough. My course being meant for Law up straight. I wonder what i'll do...

If I go there, it would be an adventure. :D and I am thinking that finishing law here anyway isn't sure a ticket to success at all... with most of them just ending up hanging a "notary public" sign outside their doors. Besides, if I really want to be a lawyer i could do it anywhere. I could take it there in the University of Toronto... though I have to save up a hell lot of money for that, which would take time ($30,000 a sem, I think). Can lawyering wait??

Another thing, I am contemplating about my life plans with ******. His work is going to be based somewhere states and he tells me that if we are going together ( i mean, end up being together), we'd have to stay somewhere there too. Which would mean that if I study law here and we end up *together* then we'd have to move there and all my efforts will be for nothing... I unfortunately can't bring my 'lawyerhood' here to there in the future. I would have to study *a-gain* which would mean another four years and so... ( maaaan, my dreams of putting up a family is soooo going down the drain. i prolly am meant to stay a funky, hot, and witty bechelorette. (lol) whaddayathink??)

Anyway he is telling me I should go... and he'd go follow after two years or so... sweet thought, nevertheless the uncertainty of what life may bring bites on me... PLUS i am thinking about how i won't even be able to make use of my magna cumlaude standing as *plus* factor when I decide to go there...

If I stay here... my life will be comfy... i'd just have to look for work and stuff... work my ass off for some salary, do law at the same time etc., etc... but it would be stagnant. slow. unexciting.

I have always thought of my self as a person who loves adventure no matter how tied i am to tradition... but I just can't help but debate with that adventurous self right now because I am worried if that adventure is worth it... what if a i lose track something I want so badthat it is one standard of my self-sulfillment? Is it safe to believe that if really want it, i would get it if I just strive for it... no matter where I am. (too idealistic... whaaa. its racking my brain)

a while ago, i got my "sablay"--this sash UPians use for graduation ceremonies. my grad's going to be on april 24 and i would have to decide by then what i would like to do with my life. i don't want to think about such things just yet so i just hope time wont fly by so fast......


haaaay...

oh well, i better get back to my thesis first. :)

because i got tired of working on my friggin' thesis...

my clicker-happy self took over. :D



















i am a narcissist **bow** :D

^_^

I've decided on keeping my two online journals updated... :)

Visit the other one at http://www.livejournal.com/users/geijutsuka_chai/


yun lang muna. LOL. i miss posting here... :D

i did some template changes for tagboards and stuff. :) maybe when circumstances are favorable, i'll work on a new layout. :)

shit. i did it. i passed the LAE. :D

Screw all ideas of applying to other law schools!!!

This is the "IT"...

There is only one Law School in this country and that is UP Law.

All I gotta do is pass that interview and hell... im on a roll to my greatest dream!

:D